“Did you get revenge on your first love?”
When I asked, Kazama nodded with a carefree smile.
“When my parent remarried in middle school, we moved back to my hometown. He didn’t recognize who I was. Well, my surname and appearance had changed, so it couldn’t be helped. And then, we happened to be seated next to each other again, so I used my trained techniques to make him fall for me. That idiot fell for me in just a few days. He confessed with his face bright red. Even though he had laughed at me like that.”
Saying that, Kazama gazed into the distance.
“That really felt amazing.”
I kind of understand the feeling.
Both my heartbreaks ended before I even confessed, but if my second love had been fulfilled, I might have felt like I got revenge on my childhood friend.
“I rejected the confession, of course. But the sense of superiority I felt then—I still can’t forget it.”
“…So that led to now?”
“Boys who sit next to me remind me of him and make me feel good. I can’t help but want to make them confess. Then I reject them when they do.”
So she awakened to pleasure from that revenge for her first love.
And she’s continued with that feeling until now.
“That’s the only reason. It’s not that I have a grudge against whoever ends up next to me or anything. It’s just that I hold grudges forever… In that sense, maybe I’m still trapped by my first love. Actually, I haven’t had a second love yet.”
When she finished, Kazama looked somewhat refreshed.
This story is probably true. There’s no benefit to lying here.
What should I do?
It feels like the right choice would be to push away this girl with a bad personality, but currently I’m in a position where I have to conquer Kazama. Pushing her away isn’t an option. If I condemn Kazama here, developing a romantic relationship will be impossible.
Would being kind here work?
As someone with zero romantic experience, I unfortunately can’t think of the right words to say in this situation.
“That’s everything. While telling my story I realized it again—my personality really is rotten. Oh well. So, what do you think after hearing it?”
I can’t let that secret be exposed.
It’s all to avoid being called “Essay Guy.” And for a peaceful high school life.
“After hearing that, I’m convinced. Kazama, you didn’t do anything wrong. In fact, I want to praise you for doing something wonderful.”
I steeled myself and said that.
There were a few seconds of silence.
Kazama stared at me with a surprised expression.
“You were listening, right?”
“I was. First of all, what’s wrong with making someone fall for you? It’s not bad at all. Putting in effort to make someone fall for you is normal—it’s common sense. Most romances in the world start that way.”
If she had been mocking the boys who confessed to her with her friends, I might have gotten angry. I would have loudly declared it the worst behavior.
However.
“Did you tell anyone about conquering guys who sit next to you?”
“I didn’t. If I told anyone, they’d definitely hate me.”
Just as I expected. Since Kazama considers her actions to be evil, I figured she hadn’t told anyone.
Kazama just put in effort to make someone fall for her.
She kept personal notes about the guys she conquered, but she hadn’t told anyone. If it was just her own private enjoyment, that’s totally fine.
“There are no victims, so what’s the problem?”
“But—”
“There’s no one. Falling in love with someone can’t be harm. If making someone fall for you were a crime, actresses and idols would be major criminals.”
“Well, I guess that’s true.”
It’s an extreme argument if I do say so myself, but Kazama seemed reluctantly convinced.
“Besides, what you’re doing is charity work, Kazama.”
“What do you mean?”
“Even though it’s to make them fall for you, Kazama actively talks to them, right? That’s really wonderful for guys who aren’t popular. The act of a cute girl just talking to you normally—you don’t know how much that delights the unpopular guys of the world.”
“…That’s gross.”
Don’t call it gross.
“Even as adults, guys spend money just to talk to cute girls. In other words, Kazama’s service is saving many guys. Guys who aren’t handsome are just that kind of creature.”
I understand.
Most girls are cold to anyone who isn’t handsome. Even when I talk to them normally, they respond curtly and it irritates me. Especially with greetings. Their energy level obviously goes up when greeting handsome guys.
But Kazama is different.
Regardless of looks, she talks enjoyably with everyone.
“Kazama is a blessing to unpopular guys.”
“Is that so?”
“I’m unpopular and I’m saying it, so there’s no mistake.”
I declared confidently, but for some reason Kazama looked at me with sympathetic eyes. I don’t get it.
“So don’t worry about it. They say it all the time—in love, the one who falls loses.”
“…Loses.”
“Right, loses. The guys you toyed with just became losers on their own. They fell in love on their own, confessed on their own, and got rejected on their own. There’s absolutely no need for you to feel guilty about this, Kazama. You won.”
In love, the one who makes someone fall wins.
The one who confesses is in a one-sidedly weak position, while the one being confessed to holds the power of life and death. This is an absolute, unchangeable rule of romance.
So Kazama is free to look down on them and reject them. The one who makes someone fall is stronger and superior. That’s all. The one who fell can only do as they’re told.
“Actually, if you feel even a little guilty, absolutely don’t apologize.”
“……”
“I’m not going to spread it around, and if you’re worried about it, Kazama, there’s no need to reveal it either. Revealing it would do more damage to them.”
If they learned the truth, they might resent her for being toyed with. There are things in this world better left unknown.
“The guys who confessed to you are probably satisfied too. They conveyed their feelings to someone they liked. You saw Yamada’s refreshed face, didn’t you? Kazama, you should be proud. If you continue being a good woman, the guys who got rejected will be rewarded too. Making them think their judgment wasn’t wrong—that’s atonement, or rather, redemption, isn’t it?”
I said it well if I do say so myself. I’m surprised my tongue worked this smoothly.
“If you feel like reforming, just hold back from now on. Um… if I’m good enough, I’ll help you anytime. You can rely on me.”
How’s that?
Following up with her while casually suggesting we become closer from now on. This advanced technique is the crystallization of skills I cultivated through games.
“I understand what you’re trying to say, Kanbara-kun.”
It seems to have gotten through.
“…Cheeky.”
“Huh?”
Kazama slowly started walking.
“I’m going home. See you.”
Huh?
This isn’t the development I imagined. In my head, this was supposed to be the scene where Kazama, impressed by my words, blushes and becomes conscious of me as a man.
Kazama left just like that.
“Eh, wait? Did I fail?”
I stood there dumbfounded for a while.
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Let me get straight to the conclusion: I failed.
Despite unleashing my best words, they apparently didn’t resonate with her heart. In the end, Kazama just went home like that. There was no action after that.
The next morning, after arriving at school, I was searching for the cause at my desk.
Where did I go wrong?
I thought I’d flirted perfectly if I do say so myself. Why didn’t Kazama bite? On top of that, there was Kazama’s expression when she left. She looked a bit frustrated, and that bothered me.
Due to my lack of romantic experience and even experience talking with women, I couldn’t figure out the reason for my defeat at all.
As I groaned at my desk.
“Good morning, Kanbara-kun.”
Kazama, who had arrived at school, greeted me and sat down next to me.
Her face was the same as usual—the one I now knew was a mask.
“G-good morning.”
“It’s nice weather today.”
“Yeah, sure is.”
“Though weather that’s too nice is also a problem. It’s still hot, so we need to be careful about heatstroke.”
There was no change in Kazama’s behavior. It was as if yesterday’s conversation never happened.
As I stared at her, she started preparing while humming.
“What’s wrong? Why are you staring?”
“N-nothing!”
“Really?”
Before long, the girls came over to talk to Kazama as usual.
“I’m coming now, wait for me.”
Kazama stood up and, as always, walked toward the group where her close female friends were.
“Oh right, I need to tell Kanbara-kun something.”
“What?”
“It’s a declaration of war. Be prepared from now on.”
A declaration of war sounds ominous.
Personally, those were words I meant as flirting, but did I anger Kazama somewhere along the way?
As I was confused, Kazama’s face came closer.
“It’s frustrating, but yesterday’s attack really hit me hard. You probably noticed, but I’m surprisingly prideful. I’m going to properly get back at you, Kanbara-kun. Be prepared from now on. I’ll definitely make you fall for me.”
She whispered in my ear.
…Eh, attack?
Unable to understand, I looked up, and Kazama walked toward her waiting friends while giggling.
Her smile at that moment felt slightly different from the ones before. It was like the smile of a mischievous fairy appearing in a story.
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