“…And what is that?”
Kimiya’s quiet question was like an arrow aiming straight at me.
No—maybe that question wasn’t coming from the girl in front of me, but from my past self.
Can I be proud of who I am now?
It was a question thrown at the old me, who just wanted to be “a good guy” without thinking.
So I answered.
“──Shiranui’s a bit like how I used to be.”
“You and Shiranui?”
“Yeah. Though… calling it ‘how I used to be’ makes it sound like it was a long time ago. It was recent, really. I used to pretend to be a good person out of nothing but petty defiance—and Shiranui says the same kind of things I used to, only she means it.”
“…I don’t really see it that way.”
“Yeah… and that’s probably true, too. Saying we’re alike just means we’re similar, not the same. Shiranui’s probably nothing like me at all.”
“What do you mean by that…?”
Kimiya tilted her head at my seemingly contradictory words.
But the truth is, both things are right. I smiled at her.
The most powerful free weapon I have—something that costs nothing to create.
“It’s a simple difference. Unlike me, who gave up completely, Shiranui still believes in it.”
“……………………”
“──That’s something I can’t betray. That’s the only reason I want to help her.”
Shiranui believes in goodness, friendship, and the positive side of people.
But I lost the ability to believe in those things.
I only looked at others with calculation—rebelled because I was treated like I had no worth.
Shiranui, on the other hand, doesn’t do any of that. She just acts naturally, without a reason.
Seeing both our similarities and differences made me realize—I can’t betray her anymore.
“This is just calculation. I didn’t want her to change, and that’s all this is—my own selfish calculation.”
Even so, my resolve hasn’t wavered.
That’s why I’m standing here now.
“Did that explain it?”
I asked, and Kimiya let out a small sigh.
“…Yes. I suppose this is the part where I should act like I’m convinced.”
“That sounds like something someone not convinced would say…”
“Well, as you know, I’m someone who values logic over emotion. Although, you’re the only exception to that.”
“Why go that far…?”
“Let’s see. —How about this? What if I said it was love at first sight? They say a girl in love is unbeatable, right? Maybe that’s why I’ve been acting so recklessly.”
“……………………”
Seeing me fall silent, Kimiya’s shoulders shook with a laugh.
“Judging by that look, I guess you didn’t believe me. That’s a shame.”
“No, well…”
“But at the very least, it’s true that I was worried about you. We’ve finally met, after all. I just wanted my new friend to enjoy school life here. That’s not so strange, is it? That’s my only motive. I wanted to know how far you were willing to stick to your original goal here at Seishinkan.”
At those words, I stared at her, stunned.
“That’s… it? Wait, but Shiranui—what about her?”
“To be honest, I really don’t care about Shiranui. From start to finish, I’ve only been thinking about you. Oh, and don’t worry. I just collected a small favor from the student council in return for introducing you.”
“…Then, don’t tell me… this was really just to check how I felt?”
“Exactly.”
“────────”
As I stood there, completely speechless again, Kimiya continued.
“Sou-san. You’re underestimating me way too much. Usually, you give me a little more credit.”
“…Huh?”
“Just so you know—I had plenty of other ways to crush her if that’s what I wanted. If I were serious, I would’ve made the preparations much more thoroughly.”
Maybe she’s right…
The fact that I even thought that made me feel like I’d already lost.
“It’s true that Shiranui still doesn’t have a great reputation. There are students here who were hurt by people she called ‘friends.’ —Don’t forget that.”
“That was… the incident you dealt with, right…?”
Maybe that was the best way to protect Shiranui herself.
“I just figured it would go more smoothly if I handled it. It’s true she didn’t do anything wrong herself, but she didn’t do anything to make people like her either… and some students see that the same way. Even if I did nothing, there are still people who would want her gone.”
If that’s the case, then maybe Kimiya’s approach was also a warning.
Just how many steps ahead is this girl thinking?
“If trouble comes up, I won’t be able to protect her. I don’t like doing things that have no meaning.”
“…Then this must have been something meaningful to you, huh?”
“Yes. —Because you, Sou-san, plan to live the next three years based on calculation, right? That’s why I thought I’d teach you. And this was the quickest way.”
With that, Kimiya Natsuki gave a thin, wry smile—
This is not the smile of a normal lively girl – it is the smile of an empress who is always calculating.
“──There’s no one in this school who lives more by calculation than I do.”
After seeing that, I had no choice but to admit it.
Looks like, at the very least, I picked the perfect school.
“Please use me as a reference. I think Kimiya Natsuki is a pretty decent role model.”
“…I’ll take notes.”
“Well then. I’m looking forward to your performance. It’ll be tough, but do your best.”
READ THE ORIGINAL TRANSLATION AT LOCALIZERMEERKAT.GITHUB.IO
In the end, she even gave me encouragement.
I came here thinking I’d be the one convincing her—but in reality, I was the one being warned.
At least looking at the outcome, her actions brought the best possible results.
She tested my resolve, revealed Shiranui’s past, involved Isago and Minase—and did it all in one move.
That’s how you use calculation. She showed me that.
And to think, this kind of person is just walking around as a sporty, friendly girl…
“…I give up. I’ve totally lost this one…”
But strangely, it didn’t feel bad.
After all, I’m just a beginner at this whole “high school debut” thing.
In that sense, Kimiya is far ahead of me. I should learn from her honestly.
—So I won’t end up being used one-sidedly by someone else.
A healthy relationship is one where both sides use each other fairly.
That’s what I believe in. That’s why I’m here.
It was the very first calculated decision of Kageyuki Sou’s life.
※
“Phew. Saying big, important things you don’t really mean is kind of embarrassing…”
After parting with the boy, the girl muttered to herself as she walked down the hallway.
Despite her words, her expression didn’t change at all. To her, this was just another ordinary day.
Still, for her—Kimiya Natsuki—this had been a bit of a risky gamble.
“If that really made him hate me… I wouldn’t have recovered for ten years.”
But her instincts, sharpened over her life, told her that wouldn’t happen.
And in the end, they were right.
Even so—she was glad he didn’t notice how nervous she really was inside.
“…………”
Her eyes were always used to judge people’s worth.
Her mouth was always used to manipulate others.
Whether it was fortunate or unfortunate, she was a genius at that—and equally, whether fortunate or not, she had grown up with completely normal feelings. She just didn’t know any other way to be.
So she did what she always did.
The only difference this time was one thing—this time, the boy she faced was her first love.
She knew it the moment they met again at this school.
That’s why she asked:
[──Sou-san, you don’t like people like me, do you?]
Because maybe the pain she caused him long ago was still holding him back.
As he said himself, intelligence isn’t about good or bad—it’s about using it or not.
It’s not like she figured it all out in an instant. Maybe he thought she did—but she just knew from the beginning. That’s all it was.
A girl with a memory far beyond her age remembered everything.
His face, his name, the fun times they shared back then—and the way she hurt him at the end.
She’d regretted it all this time.
She had betrayed the first friend who ever took her hand and led her out of a joyless, fake party—betrayed him in the worst way.
But when they met again, he said to her:
[…No. I came to this school because I wanted to be like that.]
To her, that reunion was the greatest thing—a miracle, even.
But she wasn’t the type to just accept a miracle and leave it at that.
That’s why she made a vow:
──That she would do whatever it took to help him.
That’s why she couldn’t put her feelings into words. At least not yet. Not until she could forgive herself.
“…Nevertheless…”
Even so, there were miscalculations, and that’s precisely why Kimiya Natsuki had to include those random variables in her calculations.
There’s no doubt he remembers that day. Kimiya knew it immediately from his attitude the first day they met. There are signs that he also suspects who she is.
However, it seems he doesn’t remember everything.
This is because there are too many people with the same name in this grade level.
In fact, Kageyuki clearly remembered that back then, she had only revealed her first name. If she had given her family name at that time, it would have been better, but the name Kimiya was a bit too heavy to bear.
No, that alone wouldn’t have been a problem.
The biggest issue is elsewhere. The girl remembered this fact as well.
—The fact that she wasn’t the only “Natsuki” at that venue on that day.
The young man’s memory is vague partly because he was young, of course, but also likely because multiple people had the same name, making it confusing.
Naturally, even Kimiya herself doesn’t know whether everyone had introduced themselves by name or not.
It’s also unclear whether the other “Natsukis” remember the young man. There is one person who definitely remembers, but that “Natsuki” hasn’t yet realized that he was the child who was at the venue.
Kimiya doesn’t want him to remember.
She really wishes he would just continue to forget.
The reason should be obvious.
Because—
“I don’t want anyone but me to be called ‘Natsuki’ by Sou-san.”
—After all, it’s better not to have any rivals in love.
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