Month B, Day ?
Today, I was enjoying my laziness until around noon. Wake up, play games, watch videos, fall asleep. Wake up at noon. Is this too much fun?
However, that peace was shattered in an instant. The conclusion: a visitor. It was my mother. If it were just her, it would have been fine, but for some reason, the Student Council President was also there.
My brain was filled with question marks. For now, I mechanically let them into the house and led them to the living room. After serving tea, I point-blank asked my mother why they came and why the President was here. The answer was something like this:
- This morning, my mother’s sister—my aunt—came to visit my mother’s house.
- That aunt is the President’s mother, and the President had come along.
- My existence was revealed through some coincidence. Since my mom was planning to bring me supplies (food, etc.), the President came along to say hello to her cousin.
Since I couldn’t say it to their faces, let me write my retort in this diary:
“Save those rom-com developments for Sakakibara’s place!!”
I mean, right?! I just get confused when put in that situation!!! I don’t have any special feelings for her, and in fact, please just go join Sakakibara’s harem already, I’ll give you three hundred yen!!!!
Honestly, I didn’t feel like I was alive while the President was in my house. She kept looking at me with a smile as if she were observing me. I felt like a panda in a zoo. That’s a bit too prestigious a comparison for me.
We talked, but I think the content was quite ordinary. “What a coincidence,” or “What’s your favorite food?” Is this an arranged marriage interview?
After about two hours, my mom and the President left. For now, I don’t really want them coming back, so I “threw salt” (symbolically) in my mind to ward off bad luck. Rom-com, fly away to Sakakibara’s place!
Just as I thought that, a message came from Sakakibara a moment ago: “I ran into the President at the convenience store! She asked about you, so I hyped you up! (Thumbs up emoji).” While it’s pleasing for a Rom-com Protagonist (my personal label) to be blessed with events, I really wish he wouldn’t do unnecessary things.
Still, ever since I became a high schooler, it hasn’t been boring. The end of the holiday is approaching, but strangely, my mood isn’t getting heavy. Midterms are close once school starts. But even that can be an event in a rom-com.
Well, to calm my excitement, I’ll close today’s diary here.
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Month B, Day α
The long holiday ended, and school began. In the classroom, there were various people: those with high energy still in holiday mode, those with sunken expressions despairing over school starting, and those already slumped over their desks catching up on sleep after pulling an all-nighter.
Amidst that, what about the Sakakibara Harem (my personal label) led by the Rom-com Protagonist (my personal label)? The Childhood Friend Heroine (my personal label), Takashiro, was stealing shy glances at Sakakibara. The Mixed-race Heroine (my personal label), Shironami, was puffing out her cheeks in an obviously “I’m mad” attitude while also stealing glances at him. The Honorary Friend Character (my personal label), Sasaki, was pretending to sleep while staring intently at Umihara. And the Protagonist (my personal label), Sakakibara, was holding his head in his hands, troubled by something. As for me, the world-renowned Rom-com Watcher, I was observing this group, deeply moved by how this setup was already so “rom-com.”
Apparently, something happened to each of them during the break. It’s a shame I couldn’t see the rom-com between Sakakibara and the heroines, but even I didn’t feel like sticking to them during their private time. Or rather, the only way for me to get info on Sakakibara’s circle is to ask them directly—otherwise, I’d have to contact the Yandere Heroine (my personal label), who is Sakakibara’s older sister. Asking him directly would be suspicious, and I can’t exactly ask his sister to “tell me the date schedule of your beloved brother with other women.” There’s a chance people would actually die.
So, after the job at Sasaki’s house, we only had social media interactions. Because I had been starved of it, I was full of “rom-com observation” fervor today.
That said, a major event wasn’t likely to happen on the very first day back, and Sakakibara and the others spent a normal rom-com day. However, seeing the “Early Heroine Duo” (the Twin Castles) acting somewhat awkward around him, it might not have been “normal” after all.
This is 100% speculation, but I bet each of them had a slightly “naughty” event—a so-called “Lucky Lecher” incident—making the heroines more conscious of him, while Sakakibara is troubled because such events happened with both of them.
By the way, unable to watch him suffer, I pulled him aside during lunch to ask what was up. Apparently, at Takashiro’s house, he accidentally pinned her down, and in town, he accidentally grabbed Shironami’s chest when they bumped into someone. I might actually be a psychic.
He asked me what he should do about the two of them, so after saying the customary “Normies should just explode,” I told him he had no choice but to just apologize, even if it meant a full prostration (dogeza). In times like this, it’s better not to act cool; things settle more easily if you apologize first, even if you aren’t at fault. Besides, a protagonist’s dogeza is a kind of trope. The important thing is sincerity.
I thought the day would end without incident after that, but during the homeroom before leaving, the teacher announced we’d have midterm exams at the end of the month. A storm of groans erupted from the class. “No way!” “Aww!” and “Is it time to show my true power…?” I wonder what that last guy was about.
For an ordinary high schooler, midterms are an event to be avoided, but for the Sakakibara Harem (my personal label) enveloped in a rom-com aura, it’s a magnificent event.
As expected, Sasaki proposed a “Study Group.” Sakakibara immediately expressed his intent to join. The Twin Castles (Takashiro and Shironami) joined to follow Sakakibara. Then there’s Umihara, whom Sasaki is devoted to. And finally, me, joining so Sasaki doesn’t end up as the odd one out. A perfect lineup… In reality, I’m the one most likely to be left behind, but if that happens and everyone forgets I’m there, it’ll actually make observation easier. So, the fact that my vision is getting a bit blurry is just my imagination. It must be, right? Pien (cries).
The study group will be held at Sakakibara’s house. The reason is that he lives alone. Being able to use a house freely is truly the advantage of living alone. Since Sakakibara knows I also live alone, my house was also suggested, but Takashiro and Shironami immediately shot that down. They are naturally curious about the house of the boy they like. I understand. I wondered if the yandere sister would intervene, so I asked Sakakibara on social media; he said, “I picked a day when my sister can’t come here, so it’s fine.” He’s meticulous. Does having a yandere sister improve your crisis management skills?
And so, the study group is coming soon. I’ll close today’s diary while dreaming of all the possible events that could occur.
Month B, Day β
The day of the study session. Since we only had morning classes today, everyone gathered at Sakakibara’s house around early afternoon. Everyone showed up lugging potato chips, chocolate, and Cola. I had to wonder: what exactly was the point of a “study session” again? Then again, I suppose this is just how high school study sessions go.
When we entered the house, we were led to the living room, which was impressively tidy. It turns out Sakakibara is surprisingly fastidious. I noticed the manga on his shelves were perfectly alphabetized by the author’s name. Though, I suppose the fact that I noticed that says a lot about me, too.
We sat on the floor surrounding a large table and pulled out our study materials. Takashiro and Shironami staked their claims on either side of Sakakibara, while Umihara was flanked by Sasaki. I, meanwhile, sat all by my lonesome directly across from the “Sakakibara Harem.” At this point, I couldn’t help but wonder if this was some elaborate new form of bullying. But hey, if I get to observe a rom-com in the making, I’m totally okay with it.
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